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	<title>WIRL Project &#187; Smile</title>
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	<description>What It&#039;s Really Like.</description>
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		<title>I See My Father in My Son</title>
		<link>http://www.wirlproject.com/i-see-my-father-in-my-son/</link>
		<comments>http://www.wirlproject.com/i-see-my-father-in-my-son/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Jun 2015 09:00:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Sara Brennan]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Life/Leisure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ALS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Blue Eyes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Child]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Drool]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Father]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Goodnight]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lou Gehrig's Disease]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parent]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scribble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Smile]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Son]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Talk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Toddler]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.wirlproject.com/?p=7102</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I see my father in my toddler son when he looks at me – they share those same gorgeous blue eyes that can cut glass or melt your heart. Their eyes are filled with love and challenge; the kind of love that only a parent and child can understand. The kind of love that can endure temper tantrums, heal boo-boos, and teach you significant life lessons. Their blue eyes change colors with their temperament and health, almost like a chameleon. When they’re not feeling well, their pale skin exemplifies the color into a rich, deep blue and when they’re feeling proud, they are just right mix of blue and whatever color confidence might be. Interestingly enough, they share the same I love you, but don’t like your right now look as well – I’ve seen it enough from my father in my teenage years to immediately recognize it in my own child, even though he’s still just a baby. I see my father in my son when he smiles – their eyes squint in the same kind of way. Their personalities are infectious, they’re both social beings, and thrive on attention. They even have a similar forced chuckle when they find something funny. The best thing about their smile is that it’s so genuine – you can actually feel the happiness beaming from their bodies like warm, bright, glowing rays from the sun, which his why people love to be around them. The best thing about their smile is that it’s so genuine – you can actually feel the happiness beaming from their bodies like warm, bright, glowing rays from the sun, which his why people love to be around them. I see my father in my son when he’s happily eating my father’s secret family recipe of homemade spaghetti that I’ve prepared for him for dinner; it’s one of his favorite meals. They both love it greatly and could devour large plates of it – more than any one man or boy should ever eat in one sitting! I thoroughly enjoy watching my son gobble down this meal, not because he’s adorable and completely covered in tomato sauce when he’s done, but because it almost feels like my father is sitting right there at the table too, enjoying this special meal with us. I see my father in my son when he gets frustrated or doesn’t get his way. They’re both wired with the same short fuse that can instantaneously take them from zero to one hundred. They’re passionate, driven, and intense. I see this mostly when my toddler son is trying to tell me what he wants, but can’t quite get the words out. When he is pointing and saying what he needs, as best as he can, but can’t quite articulate, just as my father did. Secretly, I enjoy being one of the only people who can actually understand the slurred, mumbled language they speak. Sometimes it makes me feel privileged or honored that I can help them in that way, however, I wish I never had to have this role with my father. They’re both wired with the same short fuse that can instantaneously take them from zero to one hundred. They’re passionate, driven, and intense. I see my father in my son when I’m wiping the drool from his chin. How I wish I didn’t have this memory. Although my son drools from teething, my father had a very different cause. His weakening throat muscles weren’t working well anymore, causing the saliva to build up in his mouth and sometimes fall out the sides. Oftentimes he would choke, so I would use a suction tube to stop the drainage and make him more comfortable. Just as I do with my son, I would wipe his chin and clean him up without hesitation, all the while, his blue eyes were silently saying thank you. I saw my father in my son when he was learning to walk. He would take a few steps, stumble, and then cling to something to help him stand. For my sweet toddler boy, this was an exciting milestone, however when my father experienced this same stumbling, it meant something very different and grim. See, my father had been suffering for 5 years. Suffering from a terrible disease that took everything from him, including his ability to talk and eat, walk or travel, socialize, function, and eventually breathe. As his body and muscles atrophied, we all prayed he would continue to be able to walk as it was about the only thing he had left going for him, but, towards the end, his disease began to rob him of this as well. For my sweet toddler boy, this was an exciting milestone, however when my father experienced this same stumbling, it meant something very different and grim. I see my father in my son when I hand him a pencil and ask him to draw for me. He clumsily holds it the same way my father did when he would try to write me notes to articulate his words during the last few days and months of his life. He would scribble a few things here and there, mostly happy faces and sad faces, or little hearts that meant I love you; they weren’t words, but it was enough – I knew exactly what he meant. Just as I now do with my son, I saved many of these scribblings, as it was one of our only ways of communicating to each other in this stage of his life; and on this paper, I hold special memories of my father. I see my father in my son as I put him to bed every evening and we go through our nightly bedtime routine. I am always brought back to that hot summer night in July, when for the first time, I went to bed without saying goodnight to my father. It wasn’t on purpose; I actually forgot. Typically, we would have sat together for a while, sometimes a long while, watching TV and I would rub his hands and feet, which were sore and achy from not functioning well anymore. Honestly, sometimes I would try to avoid this nightly routine because, although I loved this time together, he would keep me there for much longer than I ever intended to be, but I didn’t purposefully avoid him on this July 14 night. Somehow, before falling asleep, I realized we had not done our regular nightly TV bonding session and I felt bad. I even said to my husband, Ah, I forgot to say goodnight to my Dad!, but it was late, so my husband and I agreed that I could just wait until tomorrow, but tomorrow never came. I am always brought back to that hot summer night in July, when for the first time, I went to bed without saying goodnight to my father. On July 15, 2007, at about 5:00 a.m., my father, Dominic Andriacchi, died from cardiac arrest caused by Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) or Lou Gehrig’s Disease. I never got to say goodbye or goodnight. I think of this everyday single day, especially when I am putting my son to bed. I think of my father every time I squeeze my son, give him that goodnight kiss, give him one more hug, and tell him I love him. I will never miss this opportunity again; my father taught me the importance of this. I never got to say goodbye or goodnight. I think of this everyday single day&#8230; I see my father in myself when my son wakes up from a bad dream and I comfort him. I assure him, just as my dad did with me in his darkest of days and scariest of times, that everything is going to be alright, even though I have no way of being certain of this. As my parent my father was strong, even when he was dying. As the child, I believed him when he said everything would be OK. I wish I could have done that in return for him; maybe I did? In hindsight, I wish I could have assured him that everything would be alright, especially that one last time – but I didn’t and I often have to ask myself, why? Was this always part of the plan? Would I have known I was going to be saying goodbye instead of goodnight that night? I’ll never know. I see my father in my son every day. His blue eyes are looking at me with love, thanks, and confidence. I know they are both proud of the job I’m doing as a daughter, wife, mother, and woman. But, if I’m being honest, I’m just doing the best I can; thankfully they both saw and see so much more in me. Thankfully, I had the opportunity to know my father, but my son never will – which is why I am so proud to see so much of my father in my son. &#160; &#160; &#160;]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The 10 Things That BlogU Taught Me</title>
		<link>http://www.wirlproject.com/the-10-things-that-blogu-taught-me/</link>
		<comments>http://www.wirlproject.com/the-10-things-that-blogu-taught-me/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Jun 2015 18:00:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Guest WIRL]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Life/Leisure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Technology/Web]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WIRL Challenge]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bathroom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BlogU]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Go Away]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hello]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Party]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pinterest]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Roller Skates]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Smile]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Talk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WIRL Challenge BlogU]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.wirlproject.com/?p=6996</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Guys, I’m not gonna lie. Going to a conference is hard work. But if you’re dedicated, like me, this is what you have to do. This weekend I went to the BlogU blogging conference where they run a pretty tight ship. They keep you going the whole damn time. I guess they want people to get their money’s worth or something, but I’m like, “Hold up, Ladies. I’m gonna need a nap now.” Unfortunately, this year they did not build nap time in the schedule, but all that’s gonna change next year with their new added group nap session. Nicole Leigh Shaw said so and I’m gonna hold her to it. It’s pretty much the only conference in the world that will have a nap session, which automatically makes it the best conference (even though it was already the best conference). I know not everybody who wanted to go got to go, which is why I’ve written up the Top 10 Things I Learned at BlogU15 highlighting the key elements from the weekend. It will feel like you where there. Top 10 Things I Learned at BlogU15 10. Talk to people while in line in the bathroom. You never know who you’ll meet, and it totally speeds up the waiting process. I’ve met some of my best friends in bathrooms. At BlogU15 that’s were I ran into The Dusty Parachute at long last. (Another good strategy is to talk to people at the bar. That’s where I found Orange and Silver, but she’s lush.) 9. Bring your A game to the Saturday Night Dance ParTAY, but know that you will always be shown up by Susan Mclean. She had on her badass, ORIGINAL, circa 1985, straight-out-of-her-parent’s-attic, teal and black (because that’s always a winning color combination) New Kids on The Block jacket. And roller skates. ROLLER SKATES. Anyone who shows up to a middle school party, or any party for that matter, in roller skates is the automatic winner. That’s just how it works. The woman simply will not be outdone. 8. I can no longer party like it’s 1999. This is rather upsetting news for me. I woke up the morning after the party sore, and all I did was dance. I’m still recovering and this is Day 3. Now I’m too old to even dance? How is that possible? This is not okay, Universe. I want it rectified! 7. Do whatever Jen Mann says. That’s my new motto in life. Also, marry her husband. I’ve been plotting a way to get Jen’s husband to marry me ever since I learned he is her super fan and her #1 pimp, and he doesn’t even require sexual favors. I mean I’m sure he’ll accept them, but he doesn’t require them and that’s key. My husband’s good and all, and he cooks for me, but what I really need is someone to schedule my Facebook posts, make graphics and get me an agent. I don’t know if Jen’s into sister wives or anything, but this could be another revenue stream for the business. Think about it, Jen. Here’s my little montage of Professor Mann in action. 6. Make sure posts on your own page and anything you’ve written elsewhere link back to your main post on the topic. The more links you have to a post the more credibility it has in Google’s eyes and the better it ranks. If you syndicate a post have the article link back to your original post NOT your page URL. Again, better for Google rank. 5. Say hello to everybody. Turns out people like that. Friendliness is not frowned upon. Plus, that’s what you’re there for. To meet people. And how are you going to meet people if you don’t meet people? It took a little while for me to internalize that one. About a year. Last year even though everyone was super friendly and welcoming and accessible, I was nervous, and I didn’t want to look like a idiot or know what to say so I didn’t say anything. You know what that did for me? Nothing. This year I said, “This is one of very limited opportunities to actually meet people I know online, and God dammit I’m going to meet them.” So you know what I did? I met them. It worked out so much better that way. 4. If you compliment someone on the 80’s jelly bracelets you wanted to wear because it reminded you of your Madonna period in 6th grade and that person who is another blogger you greatly admire and may or may not be Julianna Miner so generously rips them off her arm to give to you, you will forever share an unbreakable bond. 3. Make your pins on Pinterest “rich pins.” Sadly, I have no idea what that is or how to do it. If you want to know more, you should have gone to BlogU15. I can’t do everything for you, Ok? I think it might mean adding a description of the pin with key words, though. You should also make a spread sheet for your pins so you know when you posted them and can plan when to repin them in about a month or two. Oh, and you should also have a “blog” board on Pinterest for all your blog posts, which I did not know and which I currently do not have. 2. To thine own self be true. I got that from the truly inspiring Keynote speech by Nikki Knepper. While there were a ton of informative classes at BlogU and wonderful people to meet and chat with, Nikki’s speech fed the soul. It was real and honest and what I needed to hear. So often at conferences you get the down and dirty details and the technical information, which is great and necessary, but you don’t get the sustenance you need to forge ahead. It’s so easy to get distracted and overwhelmed and paralyzed by all the information and things you should be doing that you can’t possibly do. It was so refreshing amid the million and one technical things I’m always doing wrong to have some affirmation that, yes, if you keep your head down, continue doing what you’re doing, follow your gut, you will be on the right path. Because you know what? We can’t control the Internet. All we can do is continue to do what we believe in. Otherwise, what’s the point? 1. And the #1 thing I learned is I need to go away more often. My husband texted me like 20 times asking when I was coming home and if I could move up my departure time because he couldn’t take the kids anymore. When I did get home, he had dinner made for me AND cleaned all the bathrooms. Now that’s a man who appreciates his woman. And the kids? Well, Crazy didn’t miss me at all, but The Kid acted like I’d been gone for a whole month. She was nice to me. I’ve never had that experience before. I kinda liked it. *This was WIRL originally posted on One Funny Motha &#160; Join The Conversation! Easily contribute your story here. &#160; About the Author… Stacey Gill is an award-winning journalist, the mastermind behind the humor blog, One FunnyMotha, and co-author of I Still Just Want to Pee Alone,the third book in The New York Times best-selling series. Her work has appeared on such sites as The Huffington Post; BlogHer; Babble; Brain, Child; Scary Mommy; Mom365; The Good Men Project; and Mommyish. In 2014 she was named one of the Top 10 Funny Parent Bloggers of the Year by VoiceBoks. Perhaps most importantly, she is the proud founder of the Detached Parenting Movement, a child-rearing model she single-handedly developed without any guidance or advanced degrees in child psychology. Currently, she’s at work on a memoir based on this radical theory. For a good time, find her on Facebook, Pinterest and Twitter. &#160;]]></description>
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